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sober

that euphoric feeling when your sober and clean almost feels like your in a dream. you dont sleep cause your realities better then a dream. going to meetings so i can share, it helps me actually give a care. sometimes things get rough, i can make it cause i know im tough. i think about all my friends that passed away, i see my battle scars that remain. ive tried to quit different ways but nothing can seem to keep the pain away. blast music just to get away, but this addiction has a grip specailly if you make just one slip. so strong it puts you on your knees, then i start to beg and plead. asking whys this gotta happen to me?

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different

lost in a world of dreams, as a kid i couldnt even join any teams, never had a ride cause parents had work. sat around en ate even past the point to where my belly hurt, lonely and desperate for a change, i turned to drugs just to feel okay. i always got high by myself hiding my addiction, my parents were in denial didnt really have to worry about any affliction. the friends i finally got, they were useing and lived right down the block. i was the kid parents hated, til this day everyone knew when i was faded. couldnt help but to just get high, not like ive ever met any nice guy. ive tried fitting in, i didnt like it and decided to just give in, i always been different and thats okay, id rather be original anyway.

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hoes

lust is all you want, possessiveness is the need, love is the person whose in between. thought i was in love but it was nothing but lust, nothing came after we each had a bust. the word love is thrown around worse then a pair of shoes, how the fuck do you know whose true? hoes not knowing what they want shit get the fuck outta my life, you seriously thought you could be my wife? the more attention you give the more options they seek, whats the point when there so easy and cheap? now that i know that your a hoe please just walk the fuck out the front doe.

 

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american dream

somebody once asked me, what is the american dream? some people told me happiness and a partner to hold, a family, a great career and maybe a dog to own. ideally this dream is opportunity, freedom, and equality. haha! then whys there still no jobs in this fucked up economy? i guess you can say were “free” if freedom is being watched everyday! the governments fucked up what more can i say? were equal but gays cant marry? if thats equality i dont wanna keep writing this, these facts can be scary. this world is full of lie and deceit, deception, watch your son with the priest, erection. hate to say this is the world we live on, its the peoples fault  though cause its what we conceive on. cause and effect my friend is also known as the domino effect. the heroin epidemic, white suburbs of chicago are filled with it. adolescents, teens, even parents are sniffing it. theres AIDS and HIV but theres no cure? how could that be? everyone getting cancer seems like its the number one killing factor. how can we just sit here and hope for a happily ever after? we can advance and change the end chapter.

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bonnie &; clyde

baby can we be bonnie and clyde? if so can you be my ride or die? when im with you i feel so fuckin high, so high baby that i can fly. if i could fly babe id take you to the sky. we’d be together forever  and thats no lie. six feet under in the ground, baby we can travel the world from town to town. i love you like no other boo please never leave and ill never leave you, you know ill always stay, specailly since you take all my pain away. i can get lost in your eyes for days, your smile thats it you dont even have to say, i can tell whats on your mind anyway. if your my ride or die can you keep up with my crazy lifestyle? even if its chaos day to day? will you be the other half of me? will you be with me committing crimes?, even if we do end up in the chicago times. babe we can make the greatest team just let me show you how to have a good time.

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broken glass

the faster i come up, the faster i come down, simple like geography, this shit makes the world go round and round, and when you run out of shit be ready for a horrible day in a ditch. aint nothin compare to this high you found, keep goin cause you like it, aint no point in tryna fight it, dont let yourself get sick, i know its hard not bein rich, but when your sick you dont know what youll do for another fix. lost in a world, a world of broken glass, shit this world has fuckin kicked my ass. hard to find a job and stay, my social anxiety always seems to get in the way. i have depression almost everyday, when will all this shit fuckin go away!?

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demons

demons is whats inside of me, deep under my skin and down below, knew i shouldnt have looked for blows, some put it up their nose but for me id rather bleed. the smell when you cook it up, by then i dont really give a fuck. possession’s what it feels like to me, obsession to get some more, soon im out the fuckin door, ninety down the highway stretch, pray that the cops dont make a catch. needles up in my car, damn this drive is long and far. why do i always have to make more scars, soon i make the hit, now im nodding out like a bitch. damn ive always loved this shit. soon the high fads away. euphoria leaves my head, came crashing down is what i did. lost in a state of depression maybe all i need is some affection. heroin is my love even though its nothing more than another drug. i pawn anything i can get. damn i need another fix.